(no subject)

[aniline]

Dear fellow Subway riders,

Ma'am, I think it's rush hour. Not only do I suspect this because of what time of day it is, but the presence of at least 3 elbows in my back or side at all times. So I must ask, why do you think it's ok to lie across 3 seats with your feet on a 4th during rush hour? I hear you don't "give no damn 'bout what these [people] think", but I think there might be a more appropriate time and place for your really charming attitude. Also, that little blonde looks like she's about to set you on fire. I'd probably watch out for that.

Battery guy! I don't need any right now, but I appreciate that you'd be around if I did. Yes, Duracells are good batteries. That is a good deal for those. It is a great day out. Ok, seriously, I like you, but I'm trying to listen to my iPod.

Sir, I know you're rehearsing your lines, but it's really confusing to have you pointing and talking to me while you do it. Stop giving me a thumbs up. What kind of part do you have that requires you to do that so often? ...Please say Happy Days the Broadway Musical.

Miss, OMG! I recognize you from somewhere! YOU WERE ON LAW & ORDER! You're so pretty!! Eeeeheehee! Ok, I'm done.

Hey, large man. We go through this almost every day. Not you and me, just me and humanity in general, in which you are an unfortunate inclusion. Running directly into me as I exit the train causes a few problems. It causes me to scream "LET US OFF FIRST" while attempting to deflect you with my pointy pointy elbows, which appears to confuse and disorient you. Then the entire process of getting on and off the train comes to a screeching halt as you try to figure out the best course of action. Upon realizing that you can't walk through me, you just stand there. Great idea. Since this is difficult, I'm going to break it down for you. Step one: The doors open. Step Two: You stand aside. Step Three: I get off the train. Step Four: You get on the train. Now go practice at home and don't come back until you learn or are easier to push out of the way. >:|

Love,
Aniline

Comments

[ghost-girl.livejournal.com]

fjdlsfjasldfjahahahha
who from Law & Order?? I assume a guest star of some type. I still can't believe I missed the season opener. ARGH.

[aniline.livejournal.com]

She guested on Criminal Intent but for the life of me I can't remember which episode. I just had a really clear mental image of her in a scene with Vincent D'Onofrio. heh.

[goawayplease.livejournal.com]

Every actor ever has been on Law and Order... It's like a rite of passage -- they need sooo many cast members each time that they've hired half the city. If you can't get on Law and Order, you're clearly not gonna cut it as an actor.

[ankhayra.livejournal.com]

Hahaha.

These entries are great! It's like we're there.

[alazrael.livejournal.com]

I wonder what you have to say for the dudes that wander between trains making speeches until people give them money.

[miss-adventure.livejournal.com]

Thank you once again for perfectly putting into print what your fellow suffering subway riders are thinking.

Also: yay big monster feet!

[retch.livejournal.com]

lol!